KIB6 ==== Written by Mageuzi and Ndoto Msondo: Oy! It's so dark, dreary, and rainy out there! It's *awful*! Kimya: Huh? Yeah, it is.. but.. er.. aren't we underground? Msondo: Oh! Yeah.. hmm.. we.. Msondo: What the.. Kimya: Tiiiimon..?! Timon: Yeah? Kimya: What's this? Timon: Oh.. er.. it's a.. M.E.E.R.K.A.T 9000. Still in beta. Mson&Kim: Ooohhhhh... Beta? Timon: Yeah, they're still trying to decide what the letters stand for. Msondo: Er.. yeah.. what is it, anyway? Timon: It provides realistic images of the outside to boost your moral and make you feel good despite being stuck down here in an environment that is way too unappropriate for your pay. Msondo: Hey, Timon! Timon: Yes, Msondo? Msondo: What's this meeting for, anyway? Kimya: Yeah! What's going on? Timon: Well... You see, we've solved the problem of not having enough katpower to get things done around here. With having to keep turning more and more people into Timonaholics, we just couldn't get it all done on our own... Kimya: So...? Timon: So... we're inducting some new members into the KIB. Msondo and Kimya: WHAT!? Msondo: Wait a minute, Timon!! New members!? How many? Who? And more importantly, are they getting paid more than me? Kimya: Mson!! Msondo: Er... okay... are they getting paid more than *us*? Timon: They'll be here soon! Er... Two of them will, anyway! Kimya: Two? Timon, how many are there? Timon: Only three! Msondo: Three. Oy. Three new members. This could get out of hand. Kimya: What do you mean, Mson? I think it's kind of exciting, actually! Msondo: Yeah. You remember what happened when we tried to bring Uzi out into the field with us? Kimya: Oh, yeah... But these guys are probably prepared! You know Timon probably spared no expense with their training! Msondo: Are we talking about *Timon*? The same Timon that pawned off our equipment once because he had a gambling debt? Kimya: Er... TIMOOOOOOOON!! Timon: Send in Mageuzi, please. Timon: Yes. Well. Uzi, Mson, Kim, as you know, we've been short on people lately. To amend this problem, I've hired three of the best. I believe you already know Ann. Ann: Hi, guys. Timon: This other kat is one of my most devoted fans. She goes to the Disney Store every day to buy at least one thing Timon, even if she already has it! Meet Jessie. Jessie: Hiya, everyone... Timon: Well. If you'd all come with me, I'll introduce you to our third member. Kimya: Okay, so where's this other meerkat? Timon: Er... well... You see... he's not exactly a meerkat, *per se*... Msondo: Huh? Whaddaya mean he's not a meerkat? What're you trying to pull, Timon!? Anneke: TIMON!!! BEHIND YOU!! A LION!! Mageuzi: Oh, man!! Msondo: What? Huh? What-- AHHHHHHHHHHHH!! Timon: Hey! HEY!! Everyone, calm down. This is the third member. Ndoto. Kimya: N-- Ndoto!? You're that lion that I changed into a Timonaholic...!! Timon: Right. Kimya: So... he was THAT Timon-ified? Timon: Wrong. Ann, Mson, Uzi, Kim and Jessie: Wrong? Timon: Wrong. Ndoto *offered* to join the KIB of his own free will. Ndoto: That's right. Pleased to meet you guys. Msondo: Yeah, same here. Are you *truly* here to get people Timon-ified? Ndoto: Er.. yeah.. of course! Msondo: Hmm. You sure about this? Don't you think it's a *little* too suspicous that he *wants* to join the KiB? Timon: No. Msondo: Oh. Kim? Kimya: Perhaps a bit, but not really. Ndoto: Hey, I only want a lot of people to like Timon! Msondo: Yeah, we'll see. Timon: Hey, look, that's enough you two. We don't have time for this.. I've got an assignment for you all. Kim&Mson: Already?! Timon: Yeah. So? Msondo: Are they trained to go into the field yet? Timon: Err.. Kimya: Are they ready to handle all the top-secret stuff? Timon: Umm.. Msondo: And weapons? Timon: Actually.. Kimya: And know how to get out of danger? Timon: Kim? Msondo: Or all the maneuvers you have to know? Timon: Mson?! Mson&Kim: What? Timon: What are you going *on* about? Timon: You never went through training! I never went through training! Why should they? Msondo: Er.. Kimya: You have a point there, Timon. Timon: 'Course I do. Now. Are you ready for the new mission? Timon: Okie, follow me. Uzi! Get ready the demonstration. Uzi! UUUUUZI! Mageuzi: Huh?! Timon: Oy! Don't you guys *ever* listen? Mageuzi: No, sir. Timon: I didn't want an *answer*! Oy! Get the demo ready, Uzi. Mageuzi: Yes, sir. Timon: Last one in shut the door, please. Ndoto: Er.. we can't. Timon: Can't? Ndoto: No, the room is too full. Timon: Mother said there would be days like this. Okie, okie, leave it open, then. Mageuzi: Demo ready, sir. Timon: Thanks Uzi. Ooookie, as you all know, we're trying to get as many people to adore me as possible. Well, that's been kinda tough lately, even with the increased member count, now. Plus, now we have certain obsticles to overcome like that Nala scum that we so recently got rid of. Why can't they just let people be what they *want* to be, eh? Timon: Er.. but back to the point.. I was thinking that it would be good if we could go back in time to when there were *no* restrictions like that anymore. So, here we have.. Mageuzi: .. a TIME MACHINE! Msondo: TIME machine?! Timon: Yep! With this baby we can go back ten or so years and *efficiently* convert folks to Timonaholics! Then all their decendents will be Timonaholics, most likely, and all of a sudden, we have a self-sustaining system! Msondo: Er.. but Timon.. won't the Nala scum, and all those others, still attack in the present day? Timon: Errr.. lets take care of that when we get to it, huh? Maybe if it's bred inside them, we won't have to worry about it. Kimya: So where'd you get it? Timon: Oh, the lab developed it. Anyway, *all* you guys will be the first to try it out, and see how effective it is. I'll accompany you. You guys ready for your first mission? Timon: Great! All we have to do is.. ..is hold this in our paws.. Or mouth.. and we'll be transported to the date we specify. Timon: Okie, looks great, guys! Set the date to 1941, Uzi. Mageuzi: Yes sir! Ready to go! Timon: Okie.. hold tight, guys.. Countdown from 10, Uzi! Mageuzi: Yes sir.. 10 -- 9 -- 8 -- 7 -- 6 -- 5 -- 4 -- 3 -- 2 -- 1 -- Mageuzi: It works?! Timon: Oy... Well, no harm done. I guess it worked! You ready, guys? Er... guys? Eheh... oh boy. Fine. Mageuzi's not getting an invite to *my* birthday party... Ndoto: Well, this looks nice... Um... I must be in some forest outside of a main highway or something. Yeah, that must be it. I'll find the highway, follow it, and meet up with the others in the town... That should work. Okay... well... off I go. Anneke: Huh--!? WHOA!! Great. HEY, UZI! WORK ON THE LANDINGS A BIT! Oy. Hmm? What's this? I couldn't have scared all those birds off, now could I...? Kimya: ...so glad I found you, you know, because no one else is here, at least not that I saw. Kimya: Mson? Msondo, what is it? Msondo: I... I could've sworn I heard... a scream... Timon: My, they certainly were hospitable back in `41... Hey. I know that flash. Usually what follows is... Jessie and Timon: OOF! Timon: Geez, kat, watch where yer-- Jessie!? Jessie: Huh? Oh oh, I'm so sorry... Are you all right? Where are the others? Timon: Er... I'm not exactly sure... But look, the people who live in that big house might have some answers. Jessie: What? Oh, no! Mageuzi was leaning over the control box when he punched in the year... He must've been paying more attention to the digital display panel than the buttons he was pressing! He put the '4' before the '9'! Timon: Which means... what? Jessie: We're in 1491, not 1941! Timon: Er... the difference? Jessie: About 500 years difference, I'd say! Timon: Oh. Er... this is bad. Jessie: Quite bad. Timon: Come on, we have to find the others. Jessie: Right, then you can call Uzi and get him to take us back home. Timon: Eheh... well... you see... I don't really have any way of getting in touch with Mageuzi... Jessie: What? Timon: ...our budget was tight, and we needed to hire new members... Jessie: What? Timon: ...eh... we didn't make any type of radio device... Jessie: WHAT!? Anneke: Help! Oh, great, HELP! Stupid... Ugh, where are you taking me? Put me down, you big ugly! You don't know who you're dealing with here! Ndoto: That's Anneke... If I don't go to the others now, I may never find them again... But if I don't try to find Anneke... Anneke: Let me go! Let me go right now! Dragon: Thou thinketh I shall let thee go free? Anneke: Hey! Put me down right now, okay? I have friends! Friends with, uh, big weapons! Knights and people! They slay guys like you! Dragon: Soon, thy hand will be mine, and with my queen I shall take over the kingdom! Jessie: So how are we supposed to get home?! Timon: Er.. well.. I told Uzi to flip the return switch after.. Jessie: Yes? Timon: Two hours. Jessie: Two?! Timon: Well we had to have time to check it out and perhaps *start* the job. Jessie: Okie, okie, fine. I think we should perhaps at least look for the others. Timon: Where do we start? Jessie: How about that forest over there? Timon: Okie.. Timon: .. I hope you know what you're doing, Jessie! Jessie: No more than you do.. Timon: Oh great. Kimya: You *sure* you're okie? Msondo: Yes! It must have been my imagination I guess. Come on, we need to find the others. Kimya: I must say this is the *strangest* case we've had so far! Msondo: Yeah, I know. I don't know *how* Timon does it, but he *always* manages to top the stupidity of his missions each time. Ndoto: I could have *sworn* this is where I heard Ann yelling.. Ndoto: Wow! That's some tree! It's gonna take awhile to work around this monster! Dragon: Who are *you* calling a monster? Ndoto: Wha--? AHHHH! Dragon: Hi! Ndoto: Er.. hehe.. you didn't happen to see a small.. cute meerkat around here, would you? Dragon: No, I can't say I have.. buuuut.. Ndoto: Ahh! Let me down, let me down! Don't eat me! Dragon: Me? Eat you? Never! Who do you think I am? Ndoto: A DRAGON! Dragon: Yes, but I don't eat disgusting furry morsels like *you*. Ndoto: Well, thanks, you really know how to make someone feel wanted, you know that? Dragon: Hmm. Yes. Thank you. Kimya: Mson? Does this look like 1941 to you? Msondo: Hmm. Noo.. it looks more like.. like.. well a time before they put all those highways and stuff in. Kimya: You mean like those early years? Msondo: Yeah, like those early years. Like.. the 1200s or so. Kimya: Well whenever it is, why are we *here* and not in the 40s? Msondo: Timon messed up again? Kimya: Good a reason as any, I guess. Msondo: 'Course! Speaking of which, we need to find him, and the others. If this really is a messed-up job, then we need to get home. Kimya: Yeah. Anneke: Oyyyy.. What happened.. Ahh! Ndoto! Anneke: Ndoto! Are you okay?! Ndoto: Ohhh.. what.. what h-h-happened? Anneke: We got sent back in time to the medieval period because of a stupid mistake Uzi must have made and now we're stuck in this tower in what I can only assume is a castle that a Dragon threw us into and now we're trapped until we're saved. Ndoto: Riiiight. Anneke: But you need to rest.. Ndoto: Yeah.. Anneke: I just hope we get sent back home, soon. Mageuzi: Ohh, man, is Timon ever *lucky*! I guess I should be sending those guys home in a few.. in a few.. min.. minutes.. Anneke: I hope. Msondo: Hey, stop! What's that, ahead? Kimya: Hmm? Kimya: I.. I don't know, Mson. Msondo: Stay.. perfectly.. still.. Noise from rustles: OY! Kimya: Is that my imagination, or was that Timon? Msondo: That was Timon. Hey! Timon! Over here! Timon: Hey! Mson! Msondo: Hey! Jessie! Hiya! Jessie: Hi! Kimya: Where *are* we Timon? Timon: Somewhere in the 4000s I think. Jessie: Nooo! *14*00s. Timon: Right. That's what I meant. Msondo: 1400s? I thought we were supposed to-- Jessie: Yes, we were, but Uzi messed up. Mson&Kim: Uzi. Timon: Do you guys know where Anneke or Ndoto are? Kimya: No, we were wondering the same thing. Timon: Do we even know if they're in the same time period as us? What if they're, er, stranded somewhere? Jessie: Some*time*. Timon: Right. Kimya: Timon's right. What if we've got a lion and a meerkat floating around prehistory? Or sometime in the future? Jessie: Nononono, we can't have that! We all need to be together when Uzi flips the switch to bring us home! Msondo: Huh? I'm lost. Kimya: You're always lost. Msondo: True. But now I'm utterly stranded on some desert isle. Timon: Er... I'm not one for technical stuff, but from what Uzi explained to me when he made the machine, we all have to be relatively close to each other when he flips the switch to bring us home. Otherwise, we go, and they don't. Msondo: Oh. Well, Anneke, yeah, we have to find... but can't we leave Ndoto here? Maybe just an hour or so? Kimya: You *really* don't trust him, do you? Msondo: No. Kimya: Why not? Msondo: I dunno. It just... A lion? In the *kats* in black? Kimya: You're prejudiced! Jessie: Look, we can argue later, but we need to find them now, regardless. Msondo: I still say we leave him here for a bit. Timon: No can do. Another thing about time travel that we haven't quite, er, perfected yet. Once the return switch is flipped, another Time Jump, as I just now so aptly named it, can't be achieved for about a week. Jessie: A week!? Why!? Timon: You'll have to ask Mageuzi... Something about Time Jumps generating such a powerful energy field within the machine that... Kimya, finishing with Timon in unison: ...if another Time Jump occurs before the energy field dies down, a temporal rift or anomaly could form. Timon: Hey, how'd you know that? Kimya: Perginn's theory of time travel. Er... it's a hobby. Msondo: Get some new hobbies. Ow! Jessie: Any idea where the others might be? Kimya: Nope. Jessie: We're in trouble. Anneke: Do you think we could jump? Ndoto: Ann, that's the third time you've asked that. Anneke: Oh. Do you think we could find some other way out? Like a secret passage? Ndoto: I doubt it. Anneke: Well, do you think if we scream for help, someone will hear us? Ndoto: Nope. Anneke: What do YOU suggest, then!? Ndoto: When that dragon comes back, I'm going to fight him. Anneke: Wha-ha-ha-hat? And you thought *my* plans wouldn't work? What're you aiming to do? Die young? Ndoto: I'm going to get us out of here, that's what I'm going to do. Anneke: Ndoto! Hello! Anyone home? He is a very *large* and *angry* dragon. You are a lion. What do you hope to accomplish? Ndoto: If I can't beat him, then at least I can create a distraction so you can get away, right? Anneke: Wha? I suppose. Hey, now, wait a minute... Ndoto: Maybe you can escape and tell the get the others. And if not, at the very least, I can make sure you get away safely. Anneke: Oh, now that is so typical. Ndoto: What? Anneke: You. Ndoto: Me? Anneke: Yeah, you. Oh, Mr. Ndoto-lion has to come play the big selfless hero! Has to sacrifice himself to save the poor defenseless meerkat! Ndoto: I never said you-- Anneke: You implied it! Ndoto: I never meant to-- Anneke: Suuuuure. Ndoto: Anneke, if you'd just listen-- Anneke: Nah-ah, pal. Tell you what. Maybe you'd *like* to play the hero, but it ain't happening. Not this time. I'm outta here. Hey!! Lemmego!! Dragon: I believe it's time to take you to the wedding chapel, my dear. Ndoto: Not so fast! Phew... You think I'd be able to come up with something better than "Not so fast!" Anneke: I thought I told you not to play hero! Ndoto: Then shall I leave you two newlyweds alone? Anneke: Play hero! Play hero!! Ndoto: Very well.. Hey! Mr. Scaley! Down here! Dragon: Huh? Ndoto: Yeah, you! Remember me? Dragon: I thought I took care of you? Ndoto: Never! I'm a strong lion! Dragon: Yeah, sure. Ndoto: "It's a small world after all.. it's a small world after all.. it's a small world after all.. it's a small, small world.." Dragon: If you think *that* will stop me, you've got another thing coming! Dragon: Okie, okie, that's enough, I get the point, you can stop now. Dragon: OKAY! You can STOP now! Dragon: I'LL DROP THE CUTIE! Dragon: VERY WELL! YOU ASKED FOR IT! Timon: Hey! Msondo: What? Timon: D--do you hear something? Msondo: What the hell is *that*?! Jessie: THAT! Timon: HELP! SOMEONE! ANYONE! Msondo: TIMON! Timon: Hurry Mson! Msondo: Yeah, hold *on* Timon! Jessie: MSONDO!!! Kimya: MSON!! Timon: Where is he!? Jessie: He-- AHHH! Look!!! Kimya: Msondo!!! Get off of there!! Msondo: I'd like to... but if I do... he'll stomp me!! Timon: Whaddowedonow!?!? Anneke: Guys! Others: ANN!! Timon: Where were ya!? Anneke: I was being held captive by that dragon guy! Hey... where's Mson? Kimya: He's on the dragon's leg!! Anneke: AHHH!! Ndoto: Guys? Wha... Oh, no... HEY!!! DRAGON!!! It's ME you want, riiight? Dragon: I'll crush you to a pulp!! Ndoto: Mson, jump off, NOW!! Msondo: But-- Ndoto: NOW!! Anneke: He's playing hero again, oy! Mageuzi: Ohh... man, that was a good nap... ah... AHHH!! I was supposed to bring them back by now!! Jessie: What's that? Timon: Uzi's bringing us back now. Msondo: Wait! We all have to be together! What about Ndoto? Kimya: NDOTO!!! Anneke: We have to help Ndoto! We can't leave him here! Timon: There's no time! Everyone hold on to each other! Ndoto: Wh... Gu... guys...? Dragon: I'll stomp you flat!!! Anneke: Ndoto! Hurry, we're getting out of here! Grab my paw! Mageuzi: Phew! Glad to see you guys! Er... where's Ndoto? Anneke: He... Msondo: ...didn't make it... Mageuzi: What? What are you talking about? Msondo: Well... there was this dragon, you see... and-- Mageuzi: Dragon? In 1941? Timon: YOU sent us back to 1491. Mageuzi: Oops. Timon: Mook. Well... I guess it's my duty to go write up the official death report. Anneke: WHAT!?!? Are you saying he couldn't have made it? Timon: Ann... I don't think there's *any* way he could've survived. Anneke: You have to be joking! He's fine! We just need to go back! Mageuzi: You can't... not until more time passes... the machine can't handle that kind of temporal stress. Kimya: I... I'll see you guys later... Jessie: Er... Kimya? Kimya... Mageuzi: It's my fault... I screwed up. Big time... I'm putting this time machine thing away in storage until I can come up with some way to foolproof it, so this never ever happens again... I'll develop a timer, one that'll bring you back automatically after you set it and after you travel. Timon: Good idea... now... I think it would be a good idea if we all took a little vacation. Msondo: Yeah... I guess so... See you guys soon... Anneke: I can't believe it... he helped to save me from the dragon, you know... Mageuzi: Really? Timon: Er... I'll go write up that report now... Mageuzi: I... should go work on that timer... Jessie: What's that? Timon: Uzi's bringing us back now. Msondo: Wait! We all have to be together! What about Ndoto? Kimya: NDOTO!!! Anneke: We have to help Ndoto! We can't leave him here! Timon: There's no time! Everyone hold on to each other! Ndoto: Wh... Gu... guys...? Dragon: I'll stomp you flat!!! Anneke: Ndoto! Hurry, we're getting out of here! Grab my paw! Ndoto: Goodbye... everyone... Ndoto: A... Anneke? Anneke: Yeah, it's me. Ndoto: But... you just left... Anneke: I had to come back for you. Ndoto: Why... Anneke: Shh. Come on, we're going home. This mission is over. [Sure. That could have happened. But.. with time travel.. it's hard to tell. I mean, this coulda happened too..] Ndoto: Goodbye... everyone... Msondo: Oy, you think they'd clean out that storage room more often... Ndoto: Msondo...? You came back...? Msondo: Sure did. Ndoto: I... I thought you didn't trust me. Msondo: Well... maybe I don't. Ndoto: Then why did you come back? Msondo: I... I don't know. I guess I had a little change of heart. C'mon, pal. We're outta here. [Er.. and this coulda happened, too...] Ndoto: Goodbye... everyone... Mageuzi: Ndoto? Ndoto, you here? Hey! Ndoto: Uzi!! I... I'm here! Mageuzi: Ah, there you are. Ndoto: You... Mageuzi: ...came to get you, yeah. Ndoto: Why? Mageuzi: ...it was my stupid screw-up that caused this whole incident in the first place. Ndoto: No... it wasn't... Mageuzi: Yeah, it was. And I couldn't stand to lose you. You're part of the team... and a great friend. Ndoto: You are too, Mageuzi... You're the best. [But however it happened, the fabric of time once again stitches itself up and Ndoto is reclaimed back to the present and is part of the close team known as the KiB.] [Ndoto would like to dedicate ending #3 to a special friend. Mageuzi would like to thank Ndoto for his unsurpassed writing, humor and unimaginable friendship. This will certainly not be the last writing project.]